Guest Post: A Hallowe’en Story

By Joshua Clough

Time for a spoooooky Halloween story.

So way back when I was in high school, my older brother was going to university in Kitchener-Waterloo. Wilfred Laurier, actually, a fine school. Well one Christmas break, my parents drove me up to see him and the idea was that he and I would drive back together to the small town of Angus (where our parents and I lived) for some brother bonding time.

We got off to a late start, though. It was dark before we headed out. About halfway to our destination, we see a car pulled over and abandoned by the side of the road. Seems someone had some car trouble. A few miles later, we see a guy walking along the side of the highway. That’s when the debate starts.

Should we pick him up?

Josh, how many of those stupid movies you watch start this way? He could be a psycho.

Well what if he isn’t? He could freeze to death out there!

*sigh* Fine. We’ll give him a lift to the next gas station and then he’s on his own.


So we pull over and let the guy in and he’s got this bowling bag that he is clinging to like it’s got the secret rocket fuel formula. Well, just making some small talk, we find out that he’s driving to see his family for Christmas, he had some car trouble, and started hiking. I ask him so, what’s in the bag?

None of your business!

Alright, didn’t mean anything by it. We keep driving.

A few miles later, we see him hugging the bag like he’s clinging to it for dear life. My brother speaks up. You want us to keep that bag safe in the trunk or something? What’s in it, anyway?

None of your business!

Alright, sorry.

A few miles later, we see him open the bag up, stick his hand in, and sniff it. And there is a powerful, funky odor coming from it. The best way that I can describe it is like bubblegum and cat litter. So, between coughs, I say dude, that smells really funky! What have you got in there?!

None of your @#$%ing business!

Alright! Chill!

By this time we’d reached a gas station and we let him out and peel the hell out of there. Glancing into the rear view mirror, we discover that he left his bag!

What do we do?

I’m not driving back there! I told you that guy was a psycho!

Should we look inside?

What if there’s like body parts in there!?

Well then we call the cops!

So we looked inside…

Photo (c)

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